“Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).
Have you ever noticed how far and how fast worry can take you down the path of despair? There’s nothing like imaging tragic calamities to rob whatever joy you may otherwise be experiencing. The devil always strikes at the time when distracting me from God’s truth stands to weaken my faith if left unchecked. It happened this morning in church when I was feeling a bit lonely, and vulnerable.
Jon works a rotating shift which often prevents him from attending service with me. Many Sundays I am unaffected by worshiping without my husband beside me, but this was not one of them. No sooner had the singing begun when my mind spiraled with thoughts of doom. “What will I do if something happens to Jon? How will I manage life as a widow? Is this a vision of more lonely church services to come?”
Taking inventory, I knew what prompted these fears of dread. Some were founded in the reality of close friends who have recently lost their spouse through death or divorce. Such catastrophes often lead to quiet introspection and empathy whenever I try to place my own feet in the shoes being worn by another. That is not a bad thing as it can make me more compassionate toward their suffering. After all, it could be my grief today instead of theirs. But I was also aware Satan was attacking me. Worry is his tactic, not God’s.
Presently Jon and I are healthy and so is our marriage. It’s only God’s grace that keeps us from facing a heartbreaking trial, and we don’t know when one will come. I am not a worrier by nature. This does not mean I never think about death of a loved one, serious illness or job loss. I have lived through all of these. But to devote energy to something that is not happening now is not only a waste of time, it’s sinful. Worry does not improve life. It only serves to stifle creativity, and hope, and to drown out God’s voice when we most need to hear Him.
Worry shows a lack of trust in the Lord’s provision and fosters doubt in His authority over my life. When I’m fretting over problems (real or imagined) my mind is focused on my own limited capacity to “handle” the situation. No wonder I’m frightened! If I am “fixed” on God’s immeasurable power I will see earthly hardships are meant for my Christ-like character development. I am a conqueror in the power of the Holy Spirit. Nothing is beyond God’s reach to heal and restore.
Many times Jon and I talk about what life would be like solo. If God takes me first Jon says he would spend the insurance money on therapy because he’d be so heartbroken. Should the reverse scenario occur, I’d spend the money on contract services whenever something broke. Jon is very handy—he can fix anything! I am mechanically challenged to say the least.
Truth be told, I would grieve terribly if Jon goes before me. I am crazy about my husband, and we’ve only had eight years together. When you marry later in life you realize how precious your time is. Would I be scared, lonely, and anxious if I were a widow? Yes, I would. But praise God I do not have to remain stuck in those thoughts and emotions! I can choose to meditate on God’s Word and let Him comfort my troubled soul, and bring helpers into my life. He can do that for you, too.
Peace through an intimate relationship with Christ squelches worry. Death will come to all, but it holds no victory. Jesus conquered it, so we have nothing to fear! I don’t know when He will call us home to be with Him. Until that day I am going to enjoy the blessing of my beloved husband, and my trusted Savior who brought us together. What will you choose? Worry or joy? Satan’s lies or Christ’s truth? “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Streets of Marble; Streets of Gold
“The great street of the city was of pure gold, like transparent glass” (Revelations 21:21).
Have you ever wondered what heaven will be like? The Bible tells us the streets will be paved with pure gold. The closest I’ve come to gold was walking streets of marble in Verona, Italy. Jon and spent 10 glorious days touring many regions of that wonderful country, and found ourselves in the opulent city of Verona while en route to Venice. All its richness made me realize earth is beautiful, but nothing compared to what God has planned for those who love His Son!
The most spiritual experiences Jon and I had in Italy were often found outside of the churches we toured. In the sacred ruins God spoke to us of people who lived long ago, and whose lives were altered by sudden tragedy. How do you explain how much more we were deeply moved by the Roman Colosseum versus the Vatican and St. Peter’s Basilica? Naturally, we admired the Vatican museum and Sistine Chapel for the magnificent structures they were. But with so many people shuffling through beside us it did not lend itself to quiet contemplation. In the Colosseum we reflected on all those who lost their lives there, many for their Christian faith.
Pompeii had the same sobering effect on us. The eruption of Mount Vesuvius on August 24 in 79 AD buried the city under 60 feet of volcanic ash by August 25. We were visiting it on August 25, 2010 and while we marveled at the engineering genius of the former residence of Pompeii, their preserved plaster bodies were a reminder that life can change very quickly. The people had ample warning to leave the area, but elected to stay because they did not understand the danger at hand. They believed the dark rain was a sign that the many gods they worshiped were with angry with them, so few fled Pompeii. Instead, they slowly and painfully perished and disappeared from view for over a thousand years.
Are people no different today than they were in Pompeii? Doesn’t God send many warnings that we are in danger of being cut off from Him forever apart from a relationship with Jesus? I shudder to think how long I ignored His message, but praise God He did not give up pursuing me until I responded to His invitation to fellowship with Him! Peace, joy and comfort are yours when you give your heart to Christ. You’ll never have to fear His abandonment in this world, or in eternity, when you’re sealed with the blood of His sacrifice for your sins. Heaven is secured when you believe in Jesus as your Lord and Savior, and give Him your life.
Our Roman holiday was very special. The adventures we shared, and the new friends we met, will always cheer our souls when we reflect on those magical summer days. The places we visited are etched in our memory to draw upon at will: Capri’s rugged island landscape, Rome’s glorious fountains and ancient ruins, Venice’s romantic gondola ride, Assisi’s spectacular hillside decorated with olive streets illuminated under a full moon, Florence’s stunning artwork and statue of David, Lake Como’s deep blue water and view of the Alps, and Verona’s impressive marble streets that showcased the city’s wealth.
These were only a few of our experiences. With all the treasures we saw, I still couldn’t help but exclaim as I walked on Verona’s marble streets, “This is nice but it’s only a warm up for heaven’s streets of gold!” Our Father has great riches to lavish on His flock. Is He your Shepherd? I pray you are one of His sheep. Hope to walk beside you one day in the kingdom of God! It’ll be much better than Verona. “The great street of the city was of pure gold, like transparent glass” (Revelations 21:21).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Have you ever wondered what heaven will be like? The Bible tells us the streets will be paved with pure gold. The closest I’ve come to gold was walking streets of marble in Verona, Italy. Jon and spent 10 glorious days touring many regions of that wonderful country, and found ourselves in the opulent city of Verona while en route to Venice. All its richness made me realize earth is beautiful, but nothing compared to what God has planned for those who love His Son!
The most spiritual experiences Jon and I had in Italy were often found outside of the churches we toured. In the sacred ruins God spoke to us of people who lived long ago, and whose lives were altered by sudden tragedy. How do you explain how much more we were deeply moved by the Roman Colosseum versus the Vatican and St. Peter’s Basilica? Naturally, we admired the Vatican museum and Sistine Chapel for the magnificent structures they were. But with so many people shuffling through beside us it did not lend itself to quiet contemplation. In the Colosseum we reflected on all those who lost their lives there, many for their Christian faith.
Pompeii had the same sobering effect on us. The eruption of Mount Vesuvius on August 24 in 79 AD buried the city under 60 feet of volcanic ash by August 25. We were visiting it on August 25, 2010 and while we marveled at the engineering genius of the former residence of Pompeii, their preserved plaster bodies were a reminder that life can change very quickly. The people had ample warning to leave the area, but elected to stay because they did not understand the danger at hand. They believed the dark rain was a sign that the many gods they worshiped were with angry with them, so few fled Pompeii. Instead, they slowly and painfully perished and disappeared from view for over a thousand years.
Are people no different today than they were in Pompeii? Doesn’t God send many warnings that we are in danger of being cut off from Him forever apart from a relationship with Jesus? I shudder to think how long I ignored His message, but praise God He did not give up pursuing me until I responded to His invitation to fellowship with Him! Peace, joy and comfort are yours when you give your heart to Christ. You’ll never have to fear His abandonment in this world, or in eternity, when you’re sealed with the blood of His sacrifice for your sins. Heaven is secured when you believe in Jesus as your Lord and Savior, and give Him your life.
Our Roman holiday was very special. The adventures we shared, and the new friends we met, will always cheer our souls when we reflect on those magical summer days. The places we visited are etched in our memory to draw upon at will: Capri’s rugged island landscape, Rome’s glorious fountains and ancient ruins, Venice’s romantic gondola ride, Assisi’s spectacular hillside decorated with olive streets illuminated under a full moon, Florence’s stunning artwork and statue of David, Lake Como’s deep blue water and view of the Alps, and Verona’s impressive marble streets that showcased the city’s wealth.
These were only a few of our experiences. With all the treasures we saw, I still couldn’t help but exclaim as I walked on Verona’s marble streets, “This is nice but it’s only a warm up for heaven’s streets of gold!” Our Father has great riches to lavish on His flock. Is He your Shepherd? I pray you are one of His sheep. Hope to walk beside you one day in the kingdom of God! It’ll be much better than Verona. “The great street of the city was of pure gold, like transparent glass” (Revelations 21:21).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Because She Said Yes: Legacy of a Mentor
“One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts” (Psalm 145:4).
Like tiny fireflies lighting a dark forest path so, too, are the women who have been Christ’s lanterns in my life. In the eyes of others their seemingly small and insignificant expressions of faith were not unnoticed by Jesus. God spoke to me through these Christian women He placed in my circle as mentors and spiritual big sisters. Long before our lives were intertwined, they said yes to Jesus when He called them to be His daughter. They committed to sharing the Gospel with others. One day their legacy of blessing touched me; inviting me to pass the torch too.
For forty-two years I lived in the shadows drawn at times to God’s saving light, yet choosing to run away from grace. Mine was a faith of works—always seeking to perfect myself so God would love me. One-by-one these women of faith shared their struggles and the love and forgiveness Jesus offered. If I surrendered my heart and life to Him His Holy Spirit would live inside me. He would help change my ways—making me holy as He is holy. My flesh will always struggle against God’s standard of holiness, but forgiveness and mercy cover my confession and repentance.
They were living examples of what Christ could do in an obedient heart. Unlike me, their faces were not covered with shame when they stood in the light of His word. They willingly shared the peace inside their hearts that was available to me. Covering me in prayer and Scriptures, they interceded on my behalf. Their words and deeds were a twinkling light penetrating the darkness of my soul. One’s influence led me to my Savior; others help keep me near Him today.
Because they said yes to follow Christ and yes to being a servant, I have eternal life. What a mystery how God uses imperfect people to drawn us to His perfect Son. He doesn’t need us, yet He grants us this incredible honor of kingdom work. The legacy of blessing continues to grow, all for God’s glory. Because I said yes a book was written bearing the imprint of God’s life-changing love when all hope is gone; reaching people I do not know.
The magnitude of this used to terrify me. I never felt qualified to write such a story. But that’s the beauty of saying yes to God. He’s the author who speaks through our lives when we rely on His power to accomplish the task. My mentors didn’t save me. I cannot save anyone. Only the Holy Spirit can convince a sinful and contrite heart that Jesus is the Messiah. As believers of this truth, we are called to demonstrate to this generation the beauty of a life forever changed by Christ’s magnificent love.
God knows we need living examples of this love. The incarnate Christ Jesus was the exact representation of the Father. Although we are flawed, God’s light can eliminate a dark world through the cracked windows of our lives. What is your legacy? What are you saying yes to? Is it your own dreams, wants, needs and desires? Are you living for the excitement this life can bring but falling off an emotional cliff when the momentary euphoria has passed? It’s a lonely and unfulfilling life you’ve chosen, and one I used to live.
Change your course and follow Jesus! Say yes to His invitation today by confessing to Him that you know you are a sinner, there is nothing you can do to be “good enough” to enter heaven, and that you believe Jesus died for your sins and rose from the dead. He has gone to heaven to prepare a place for you if only you will accept Him into your heart as your Redeemer. Then stand back in praise and adoration as He creates your legacy of blessing; His legacy of blessing. “One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts” (Psalm 145:4).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Like tiny fireflies lighting a dark forest path so, too, are the women who have been Christ’s lanterns in my life. In the eyes of others their seemingly small and insignificant expressions of faith were not unnoticed by Jesus. God spoke to me through these Christian women He placed in my circle as mentors and spiritual big sisters. Long before our lives were intertwined, they said yes to Jesus when He called them to be His daughter. They committed to sharing the Gospel with others. One day their legacy of blessing touched me; inviting me to pass the torch too.
For forty-two years I lived in the shadows drawn at times to God’s saving light, yet choosing to run away from grace. Mine was a faith of works—always seeking to perfect myself so God would love me. One-by-one these women of faith shared their struggles and the love and forgiveness Jesus offered. If I surrendered my heart and life to Him His Holy Spirit would live inside me. He would help change my ways—making me holy as He is holy. My flesh will always struggle against God’s standard of holiness, but forgiveness and mercy cover my confession and repentance.
They were living examples of what Christ could do in an obedient heart. Unlike me, their faces were not covered with shame when they stood in the light of His word. They willingly shared the peace inside their hearts that was available to me. Covering me in prayer and Scriptures, they interceded on my behalf. Their words and deeds were a twinkling light penetrating the darkness of my soul. One’s influence led me to my Savior; others help keep me near Him today.
Because they said yes to follow Christ and yes to being a servant, I have eternal life. What a mystery how God uses imperfect people to drawn us to His perfect Son. He doesn’t need us, yet He grants us this incredible honor of kingdom work. The legacy of blessing continues to grow, all for God’s glory. Because I said yes a book was written bearing the imprint of God’s life-changing love when all hope is gone; reaching people I do not know.
The magnitude of this used to terrify me. I never felt qualified to write such a story. But that’s the beauty of saying yes to God. He’s the author who speaks through our lives when we rely on His power to accomplish the task. My mentors didn’t save me. I cannot save anyone. Only the Holy Spirit can convince a sinful and contrite heart that Jesus is the Messiah. As believers of this truth, we are called to demonstrate to this generation the beauty of a life forever changed by Christ’s magnificent love.
God knows we need living examples of this love. The incarnate Christ Jesus was the exact representation of the Father. Although we are flawed, God’s light can eliminate a dark world through the cracked windows of our lives. What is your legacy? What are you saying yes to? Is it your own dreams, wants, needs and desires? Are you living for the excitement this life can bring but falling off an emotional cliff when the momentary euphoria has passed? It’s a lonely and unfulfilling life you’ve chosen, and one I used to live.
Change your course and follow Jesus! Say yes to His invitation today by confessing to Him that you know you are a sinner, there is nothing you can do to be “good enough” to enter heaven, and that you believe Jesus died for your sins and rose from the dead. He has gone to heaven to prepare a place for you if only you will accept Him into your heart as your Redeemer. Then stand back in praise and adoration as He creates your legacy of blessing; His legacy of blessing. “One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts” (Psalm 145:4).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Praying Life Forward
“Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24).
It was an odd concept to pray for someone I hadn’t met, but not so strange to Jesus. Although my future husband was unknown to me, he was not to God. The Lord spoke to me through the words of my friend and spiritual big sister who encouraged me to seek God’s heart in this matter. Who better to be my yenta (matchmaker) than He? And so the prayer journey began in my quest for a mate, but it did not end when we married. The practice of praying life forward continues today.
This isn’t about believing enough or reciting the right words that convince my Holy Father to give me what I want. That was how my prayer life used to be. I was bound by rituals and incantations that I desperately clung to for years in an effort to control my desired outcome. There was no peace, no joy, and no sweet communion with God. I was captive to the lie that if I prayed hard enough, long enough, often enough and with enough gusto that my faith would make God respond. My spirit was not fellowshipping with Jesus, it was at war and I did not even know it. His kindness and mercy changed everything, especially my prayer life.
Before I was born again spiritually by God’s gracious gift that I accepted in faith, my conversations with Him were manipulative. I tried to be “good enough” to earn favor; it was exhausting. Honestly, I didn’t trust God. I feared His wrath but never knew His love. Jesus forgave me, cleansed me of my sins, and sent His Spirit to live inside of me so I could learn of His love and holiness. He also taught me how to pray for God’s perfect will in my life. Trust was ever-increasing. Prayers were answered as God had planned. I wanted what Christ wanted.
When writing “My Heart’s Desire: A Journey Toward Finding Extravagant Love”, I devoted a chapter on praying for Jon before we met. Fumbling initially, God eventually shaped my thoughts and words. Reverently I prayed, “Jesus, you know who my future husband is. I pray that he is a man of faith and integrity, and that you would bless our relationship. I ask that you form me into the godly wife you envision, and that our union and home honors you. Please help us to be compatible spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially, and to be good helpmates to each other.”
Surrender and trust were interwoven together. Prayer denials or delays were His loving hand of protection, not punishment. This belief continues today whenever I pray for the things of tomorrow. I ask the Holy Spirit to go before me illuminating the right path. If God is not with me I do not want to go there! These prayers encompass every aspect of life: job changes, major purchases, vacation plans, and spouses for single loved ones to name a few. God is in the future we’ve yet to experience. Doesn’t it make perfect sense to ask Him to prepare us for it and to grant us discernment along the way?
Our marriage has been a wonderful treasure because God brought us together. He longs to shape the events of your life too. May your heart overflow with gratitude rejoicing in God’s promise when His children are praying life forward, “Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
It was an odd concept to pray for someone I hadn’t met, but not so strange to Jesus. Although my future husband was unknown to me, he was not to God. The Lord spoke to me through the words of my friend and spiritual big sister who encouraged me to seek God’s heart in this matter. Who better to be my yenta (matchmaker) than He? And so the prayer journey began in my quest for a mate, but it did not end when we married. The practice of praying life forward continues today.
This isn’t about believing enough or reciting the right words that convince my Holy Father to give me what I want. That was how my prayer life used to be. I was bound by rituals and incantations that I desperately clung to for years in an effort to control my desired outcome. There was no peace, no joy, and no sweet communion with God. I was captive to the lie that if I prayed hard enough, long enough, often enough and with enough gusto that my faith would make God respond. My spirit was not fellowshipping with Jesus, it was at war and I did not even know it. His kindness and mercy changed everything, especially my prayer life.
Before I was born again spiritually by God’s gracious gift that I accepted in faith, my conversations with Him were manipulative. I tried to be “good enough” to earn favor; it was exhausting. Honestly, I didn’t trust God. I feared His wrath but never knew His love. Jesus forgave me, cleansed me of my sins, and sent His Spirit to live inside of me so I could learn of His love and holiness. He also taught me how to pray for God’s perfect will in my life. Trust was ever-increasing. Prayers were answered as God had planned. I wanted what Christ wanted.
When writing “My Heart’s Desire: A Journey Toward Finding Extravagant Love”, I devoted a chapter on praying for Jon before we met. Fumbling initially, God eventually shaped my thoughts and words. Reverently I prayed, “Jesus, you know who my future husband is. I pray that he is a man of faith and integrity, and that you would bless our relationship. I ask that you form me into the godly wife you envision, and that our union and home honors you. Please help us to be compatible spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially, and to be good helpmates to each other.”
Surrender and trust were interwoven together. Prayer denials or delays were His loving hand of protection, not punishment. This belief continues today whenever I pray for the things of tomorrow. I ask the Holy Spirit to go before me illuminating the right path. If God is not with me I do not want to go there! These prayers encompass every aspect of life: job changes, major purchases, vacation plans, and spouses for single loved ones to name a few. God is in the future we’ve yet to experience. Doesn’t it make perfect sense to ask Him to prepare us for it and to grant us discernment along the way?
Our marriage has been a wonderful treasure because God brought us together. He longs to shape the events of your life too. May your heart overflow with gratitude rejoicing in God’s promise when His children are praying life forward, “Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Monday, July 12, 2010
One at a Time
“Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people He chose for His inheritance” (Psalm 33:12).
Meandering around our front yard, I am still collecting remnants of fireworks from last week’s cul-de-sac celebration. The fourth of July was extra special this year not because of the festivities we shared with our neighbors, but because I realized how incredibly blessed we are in America beyond anything we deserve. God’s touch is everywhere.
In our household there are many things to be thankful for: my nephew’s safe return from his service in Iraq, our family’s good health, and the gift of employment to name a few. But it was more than these things. As I scanned the faces of the children dancing with sparklers as their fathers sent fireworks towards heaven while mothers snapped photos, I was touched by the diversity on our street. This is what so many have fought for, the freedom to be who we are even if it is very different from the folks beside us.
Most of us gathered that warm July night were not from Raleigh. We came from different states and countries with varying creeds and contrasting races. Yet we seek many common things like a better life for ourselves and our families. With all the social and economic challenges we are facing in America today we can still be grateful the Lord has allowed freedom to reign, even though so many have ignored God completely. Jesus has been merciful in our sinfulness as our nation fights this ever raging war to drown the voice of Christianity forever.
Sitting in the back of our pickup truck beside my husband that night, I felt a sense of urgency to pray for our country to turn our hearts and lives to Jesus. As a nation begins to fear and honor the Lord and submit to His authority, the people will be healed in their spirit. After all, what is a nation but a collection of individuals? God has revealed His love to America time and time again through His only Son Jesus Christ. While some have accepted this gift of salvation and restored fellowship with God, so many more are blinded.
My prayer for salvation is broad sweeping for our country, but God has convicted to me to stay on my knees and intercede for individuals. One-by-one a revolution can take place as spirits are cleansed and renewed by Jesus. We won’t desire to take up arms aimed at our enemies when that day comes. Instead, we’ll lift our hands to heaven with shouts of joy and praises for our long suffering King who prompted others to pray we’d become His child! Then we can declare with gladness, “Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people He chose for His inheritance” (Psalm 33:12).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Meandering around our front yard, I am still collecting remnants of fireworks from last week’s cul-de-sac celebration. The fourth of July was extra special this year not because of the festivities we shared with our neighbors, but because I realized how incredibly blessed we are in America beyond anything we deserve. God’s touch is everywhere.
In our household there are many things to be thankful for: my nephew’s safe return from his service in Iraq, our family’s good health, and the gift of employment to name a few. But it was more than these things. As I scanned the faces of the children dancing with sparklers as their fathers sent fireworks towards heaven while mothers snapped photos, I was touched by the diversity on our street. This is what so many have fought for, the freedom to be who we are even if it is very different from the folks beside us.
Most of us gathered that warm July night were not from Raleigh. We came from different states and countries with varying creeds and contrasting races. Yet we seek many common things like a better life for ourselves and our families. With all the social and economic challenges we are facing in America today we can still be grateful the Lord has allowed freedom to reign, even though so many have ignored God completely. Jesus has been merciful in our sinfulness as our nation fights this ever raging war to drown the voice of Christianity forever.
Sitting in the back of our pickup truck beside my husband that night, I felt a sense of urgency to pray for our country to turn our hearts and lives to Jesus. As a nation begins to fear and honor the Lord and submit to His authority, the people will be healed in their spirit. After all, what is a nation but a collection of individuals? God has revealed His love to America time and time again through His only Son Jesus Christ. While some have accepted this gift of salvation and restored fellowship with God, so many more are blinded.
My prayer for salvation is broad sweeping for our country, but God has convicted to me to stay on my knees and intercede for individuals. One-by-one a revolution can take place as spirits are cleansed and renewed by Jesus. We won’t desire to take up arms aimed at our enemies when that day comes. Instead, we’ll lift our hands to heaven with shouts of joy and praises for our long suffering King who prompted others to pray we’d become His child! Then we can declare with gladness, “Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people He chose for His inheritance” (Psalm 33:12).
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Sunday, June 27, 2010
The Extended Single Years
"Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him (Isaiah 30:18)."
Is being single becoming a disease you are trying to cure yourself of? Have voices of doubt from family and friends mingled with your own inner thoughts caused you to despair? Do whispers from Satan tell you if you were such a great catch you would already be caught? It wasn’t so long ago I would have answered yes to all of these questions until God began to change my heart, and my perspective. Slowly I began to realize being single was not a curse, but a time of blessed fellowship and preparation for my future.
There is nothing abnormal about desiring marriage. God created men and women to be joined together. While some people are perfectly comfortable remaining single their entire lives, the majority of us do want to get married. That being said, why does it have to be so complicated? I believe it’s because the goal is not simply to get married, but to be joined to the right spouse. Unfortunately, most couples have removed Christ from the relationship, or begrudgingly invite Him in as an unwelcome guest to be tolerated from time-to-time like a distant relative. We think we know best as we wonder why the divorce rate is so staggering.
Have you ever thought that God is protecting you from great harm by keeping you single? Do you trust that He would not withhold anything that is good from you? If marriage came so easily how tempting it would be to take your mate for granted. Maybe you feel you are ready, but the Lord may be working in the life of you future spouse. Wouldn’t you rather wait on God’s perfect timing to bring you together than to rush ahead and spoil the surprise? The longer you wait for something you really hope for, the greater the rejoicing when you behold it at last. Intense suffering in the single years can lead to greater commitment in marriage if you allow God to change your focus.
How do I know this? I was 43-years-old when I met my husband; married him at 44. There were two proposals before Jon’s. However, marrying any of those other guys would have had devastating consequences. Both those men cheated on their girlfriends and wives, including me. God was merciful; He saved me from greater pain than I had already experienced. Better still, He filled my heart with a love for Him and began to show me how we could partner through life together. If I let Him, Jesus would bring me the best husband for me, and prepare me to be a godly wife too.
My outlook on being single changed from gloomy to grateful as I dove into God’s Word daily. Bathed in His Scriptures, I surrendered the reins of control and asked the Holy Spirit to help me cooperate with His vision for my life. I gave God access to change my desire to be married, but if He planned to fulfill it I wanted the choice to be His. I prayed for God to work in my life and the life of my future husband, and for our union to honor Him. I was confident He had something really special planned for me. And He did!
If you are wondering why you are unmarried, ask God to reveal the answer before you make your own assumptions. If there are changes you need to make, the Lord will help you. The adversity and loneliness I faced in my single years strengthened me for marriage. Because I learned to turn to Jesus for wisdom, love and fellowship before and after I met Jon, my husband does not carry the responsibility only my Creator can fulfill. We cherish the gift of our marriage and the Giver who was our matchmaker. I pray you will use your single years to build up your relationship with Christ, and trust in His perfect plan for you. "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him (Isaiah 30:18)."
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Is being single becoming a disease you are trying to cure yourself of? Have voices of doubt from family and friends mingled with your own inner thoughts caused you to despair? Do whispers from Satan tell you if you were such a great catch you would already be caught? It wasn’t so long ago I would have answered yes to all of these questions until God began to change my heart, and my perspective. Slowly I began to realize being single was not a curse, but a time of blessed fellowship and preparation for my future.
There is nothing abnormal about desiring marriage. God created men and women to be joined together. While some people are perfectly comfortable remaining single their entire lives, the majority of us do want to get married. That being said, why does it have to be so complicated? I believe it’s because the goal is not simply to get married, but to be joined to the right spouse. Unfortunately, most couples have removed Christ from the relationship, or begrudgingly invite Him in as an unwelcome guest to be tolerated from time-to-time like a distant relative. We think we know best as we wonder why the divorce rate is so staggering.
Have you ever thought that God is protecting you from great harm by keeping you single? Do you trust that He would not withhold anything that is good from you? If marriage came so easily how tempting it would be to take your mate for granted. Maybe you feel you are ready, but the Lord may be working in the life of you future spouse. Wouldn’t you rather wait on God’s perfect timing to bring you together than to rush ahead and spoil the surprise? The longer you wait for something you really hope for, the greater the rejoicing when you behold it at last. Intense suffering in the single years can lead to greater commitment in marriage if you allow God to change your focus.
How do I know this? I was 43-years-old when I met my husband; married him at 44. There were two proposals before Jon’s. However, marrying any of those other guys would have had devastating consequences. Both those men cheated on their girlfriends and wives, including me. God was merciful; He saved me from greater pain than I had already experienced. Better still, He filled my heart with a love for Him and began to show me how we could partner through life together. If I let Him, Jesus would bring me the best husband for me, and prepare me to be a godly wife too.
My outlook on being single changed from gloomy to grateful as I dove into God’s Word daily. Bathed in His Scriptures, I surrendered the reins of control and asked the Holy Spirit to help me cooperate with His vision for my life. I gave God access to change my desire to be married, but if He planned to fulfill it I wanted the choice to be His. I prayed for God to work in my life and the life of my future husband, and for our union to honor Him. I was confident He had something really special planned for me. And He did!
If you are wondering why you are unmarried, ask God to reveal the answer before you make your own assumptions. If there are changes you need to make, the Lord will help you. The adversity and loneliness I faced in my single years strengthened me for marriage. Because I learned to turn to Jesus for wisdom, love and fellowship before and after I met Jon, my husband does not carry the responsibility only my Creator can fulfill. We cherish the gift of our marriage and the Giver who was our matchmaker. I pray you will use your single years to build up your relationship with Christ, and trust in His perfect plan for you. "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him (Isaiah 30:18)."
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Monday, June 14, 2010
The Blessed Curse
“Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful” Romans 12:12.
Do you find yourself wrestling with God over why He has allowed things that test your patience? Life isn’t easy for most of us, yet we make it harder by tossing our anger at the One who is working to bring a blessing out of a curse. Oh, if I only I would cooperate with Him more instead of putting up a fight! So many of my greatest struggles turned out to be the greatest character-building moments when my spirit was teachable. At the time, they did not seem like a fork-in-the-road choice. But looking in the rear view mirror God sometimes affords me a glimpse of the importance of choosing wisely.
One of the first struggles I had to overcome was with food. It’s a common problem with many Americans. In the land of plenty we’re prone to overindulgence at every turn. I was never obese, but in my late teens I donned extra pounds that did not compliment my small frame. There were a host of reasons this was happened: less exercise, finding my solace in sweets when insecurities arose, and lack of nutritional understanding. After all, doesn’t a teenager have more important things to ponder than proteins, carbohydrates and fats? Sharing one of my self-pity moments with my college roommate, her retort rattled my self-absorbed mood, “You have so much potential. I don’t know why you don’t use what you’ve been given.”
Who, me? What potential do I have? And what am I so afraid of? My answer, success! For me, it had become easier to hold back. No one expects much of you if you’re living below your potential. Yet I knew my excuses where lame. I’d grown tired of my miserable jealous feelings when skinny friends feasted on treats without consequence. Two choices were available—stagnate and surrender to my food addiction, or take control and win. Strong in self-determination, I started a strict diet and exercise regimen. I absorbed every article I could find on these topics. God was not part of the equation back then. Emphasis on my strength was all I needed, or so I thought.
For awhile, I was winning the battle. In fact, the transformation was so dramatic that friends who hadn’t seen me in months didn’t recognize me. My hair was longer, my body was 25 pounds thinner, and contacts replaced my wire rim glasses. Success tasted sweet, but didn’t last long. My weight yo-yoed whenever I felt challenged, lonely, or insecure. Although the outside had changed the inside needed work. It took a health crisis in my thirties for God to reach me. He led me to a place that my strength could not hold me. Only placing my trust in Christ’s hands could.
It all seemed so cruel, so unfair when my health was jeopardized. I felt completely out of control after expanding so much effort to create a world-approved image of myself. Again, a fork-in-the-road appeared. Do I wallow in anger and abuse my body further, or do I turn to Jesus for the healing and peace I lack? Yes, it was wise to educate myself on healthy choices in food and exercise; but my diet had to include a daily dose of heavenly love. Without it I was starved, unsatisfied, and reaching for the wrong things to fill the void.
This wellness battle will always rage to some degree in my flesh, but praise God there has been victory! My weight swings are much less, and my palate desires the nutrients my body needs. No longer do I see self-restraint as punishment from God, but as loving boundaries that keep my mind, body and spirit in harmony. Perhaps that which you are fighting so strongly against will one day be your greatest ally if you invite Jesus into the war. “Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful” Romans 12:12.
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
Do you find yourself wrestling with God over why He has allowed things that test your patience? Life isn’t easy for most of us, yet we make it harder by tossing our anger at the One who is working to bring a blessing out of a curse. Oh, if I only I would cooperate with Him more instead of putting up a fight! So many of my greatest struggles turned out to be the greatest character-building moments when my spirit was teachable. At the time, they did not seem like a fork-in-the-road choice. But looking in the rear view mirror God sometimes affords me a glimpse of the importance of choosing wisely.
One of the first struggles I had to overcome was with food. It’s a common problem with many Americans. In the land of plenty we’re prone to overindulgence at every turn. I was never obese, but in my late teens I donned extra pounds that did not compliment my small frame. There were a host of reasons this was happened: less exercise, finding my solace in sweets when insecurities arose, and lack of nutritional understanding. After all, doesn’t a teenager have more important things to ponder than proteins, carbohydrates and fats? Sharing one of my self-pity moments with my college roommate, her retort rattled my self-absorbed mood, “You have so much potential. I don’t know why you don’t use what you’ve been given.”
Who, me? What potential do I have? And what am I so afraid of? My answer, success! For me, it had become easier to hold back. No one expects much of you if you’re living below your potential. Yet I knew my excuses where lame. I’d grown tired of my miserable jealous feelings when skinny friends feasted on treats without consequence. Two choices were available—stagnate and surrender to my food addiction, or take control and win. Strong in self-determination, I started a strict diet and exercise regimen. I absorbed every article I could find on these topics. God was not part of the equation back then. Emphasis on my strength was all I needed, or so I thought.
For awhile, I was winning the battle. In fact, the transformation was so dramatic that friends who hadn’t seen me in months didn’t recognize me. My hair was longer, my body was 25 pounds thinner, and contacts replaced my wire rim glasses. Success tasted sweet, but didn’t last long. My weight yo-yoed whenever I felt challenged, lonely, or insecure. Although the outside had changed the inside needed work. It took a health crisis in my thirties for God to reach me. He led me to a place that my strength could not hold me. Only placing my trust in Christ’s hands could.
It all seemed so cruel, so unfair when my health was jeopardized. I felt completely out of control after expanding so much effort to create a world-approved image of myself. Again, a fork-in-the-road appeared. Do I wallow in anger and abuse my body further, or do I turn to Jesus for the healing and peace I lack? Yes, it was wise to educate myself on healthy choices in food and exercise; but my diet had to include a daily dose of heavenly love. Without it I was starved, unsatisfied, and reaching for the wrong things to fill the void.
This wellness battle will always rage to some degree in my flesh, but praise God there has been victory! My weight swings are much less, and my palate desires the nutrients my body needs. No longer do I see self-restraint as punishment from God, but as loving boundaries that keep my mind, body and spirit in harmony. Perhaps that which you are fighting so strongly against will one day be your greatest ally if you invite Jesus into the war. “Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful” Romans 12:12.
Your fellow sojourner,
Mary
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