To It and Through It

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know" (Jeremiah 33:3).

Hiking through the lush forest covered in dew I'm lost to all that is around. Lost in thoughts that entangle my spirit and smother my soul with distress. Lost to the beauty in my midst because I'm blinded by trials I'm mulling over in my head. Lost to the reality of God's presence on this crisp early morning as my feet hustle through the rustling leaves beneath me. The sound of a twig snapping breaks my concentration forcing my gaze to the left. In a small meadow my eyes behold a previously invisible wonder that captivates me and stops me right in my tracks.

As the mist clears and the sunbeams appear, I'm treated to a field of silk saucers suspended in air between the brush. Beckoning my husband near to view this pretty scene our curiosity moves us closer to these objects. They are hundreds of spider webs in the shape of cups about the size of our hands! They sparkled like tiny angels for a few minutes before disappearing behind the cloudy light. What a beautiful reminder of all the things God sees that escape our sight each day!

That memory revisits me every time I walk in the woods. It's a reminder to me that we who walk with Jesus are never alone. If He brings us to a wilderness life experience He not only brings us through it, but He'll give us glimpses of beauty along the rough path. We just have to call out to Him and be on the watch for His reply. Miracles and the splendor of God's glory become visible when we humbly seek His face daily. "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know" (Jeremiah 33:3).

Your fellow herald for Jesus,

Mary

The Restored Decade

“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten” (Joel 2:25).


Christmas and New Years are typically a time of reflecting on all the events of the previous year. It’s amazing to see how fast twelve months can pass and all the experiences that have shaped our lives. With all the talk these days of “the lost decade” we are enduring--lost wages, vanished 401Ks, and lack of economic growth, my mind can get clouded with the challenges of daily life. My annual recollections of the past recently took me further back in time—ten years to be exact. I did lose something. It was my old life that died the day I began my new life in Christ.

It was Thanksgiving week of 2000 when God’s pursuing love finally gripped my seeking heart and made its permanent residence in me. Jesus restored my damaged relationship with the Father. Consequently, my life has never been the same. I am continuing to learn how to live for a cause greater than myself; to live the life Jesus planned for me that is better than any vision I can conjure up. This does not mean my journey does not include disappointments, heartache and tough times. It does mean I do not walk alone. Praise God for His Holy Spirit who is forever my Guide and Helper!

If I choose to measure my life solely in terms of how much money I earn, I would be counted among those in the newly coined phrase “the lost decade”. Like so many people my corporate career is under attack, and so is my pay check. My wages have slipped to a level I made twelve years earlier, and my 401K hasn’t made much progress. But the Lord provided me with a husband eight years ago and together we are weathering life’s storms with our Creator. I often wonder where the world is headed not just from an economic standpoint, but from a spiritual one. Evidence of love is so hard to find in mankind.

This December I am settling in with Jesus and asking Him to help me listen more than I speak. I want to hear His voice above all others, and there are so many distractions right now. My hopes for the New Year certainly contain peace, prosperity and joy, but sometimes things have to fall apart before they can be repaired. This is how it was in my life and, perhaps, that is what is happening in our world today. We are sick, we need restoration, but we’re seeking it in our government and our employers instead of in Christ.

Christmas is the beginning of God’s restoration plan for all of us sinners. It began with the birth of His Son in a manger over 2000 years ago and was fulfilled when Christ died on the cross and rose from the dead. Invite Jesus to live in your heart and surrender your life to Him. True healing and contentment begins there. Only when we receive His love can we extend it to others. What a lovely outreach that would be to other hurting citizens.

Wouldn’t it be nice if no one was part of the lost generation anymore but all were forgiven of our sins and restored? Praying you will accept the free gift of salvation that cost Jesus His life because of His great love for you. Merry Christmas and a Restored New Year! “I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten” (Joel 2:25).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Defeating the Joy-Robber, Worry

“Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).

Have you ever noticed how far and how fast worry can take you down the path of despair? There’s nothing like imaging tragic calamities to rob whatever joy you may otherwise be experiencing. The devil always strikes at the time when distracting me from God’s truth stands to weaken my faith if left unchecked. It happened this morning in church when I was feeling a bit lonely, and vulnerable.

Jon works a rotating shift which often prevents him from attending service with me. Many Sundays I am unaffected by worshiping without my husband beside me, but this was not one of them. No sooner had the singing begun when my mind spiraled with thoughts of doom. “What will I do if something happens to Jon? How will I manage life as a widow? Is this a vision of more lonely church services to come?”

Taking inventory, I knew what prompted these fears of dread. Some were founded in the reality of close friends who have recently lost their spouse through death or divorce. Such catastrophes often lead to quiet introspection and empathy whenever I try to place my own feet in the shoes being worn by another. That is not a bad thing as it can make me more compassionate toward their suffering. After all, it could be my grief today instead of theirs. But I was also aware Satan was attacking me. Worry is his tactic, not God’s.

Presently Jon and I are healthy and so is our marriage. It’s only God’s grace that keeps us from facing a heartbreaking trial, and we don’t know when one will come. I am not a worrier by nature. This does not mean I never think about death of a loved one, serious illness or job loss. I have lived through all of these. But to devote energy to something that is not happening now is not only a waste of time, it’s sinful. Worry does not improve life. It only serves to stifle creativity, and hope, and to drown out God’s voice when we most need to hear Him.

Worry shows a lack of trust in the Lord’s provision and fosters doubt in His authority over my life. When I’m fretting over problems (real or imagined) my mind is focused on my own limited capacity to “handle” the situation. No wonder I’m frightened! If I am “fixed” on God’s immeasurable power I will see earthly hardships are meant for my Christ-like character development. I am a conqueror in the power of the Holy Spirit. Nothing is beyond God’s reach to heal and restore.

Many times Jon and I talk about what life would be like solo. If God takes me first Jon says he would spend the insurance money on therapy because he’d be so heartbroken. Should the reverse scenario occur, I’d spend the money on contract services whenever something broke. Jon is very handy—he can fix anything! I am mechanically challenged to say the least.

Truth be told, I would grieve terribly if Jon goes before me. I am crazy about my husband, and we’ve only had eight years together. When you marry later in life you realize how precious your time is. Would I be scared, lonely, and anxious if I were a widow? Yes, I would. But praise God I do not have to remain stuck in those thoughts and emotions! I can choose to meditate on God’s Word and let Him comfort my troubled soul, and bring helpers into my life. He can do that for you, too.

Peace through an intimate relationship with Christ squelches worry. Death will come to all, but it holds no victory. Jesus conquered it, so we have nothing to fear! I don’t know when He will call us home to be with Him. Until that day I am going to enjoy the blessing of my beloved husband, and my trusted Savior who brought us together. What will you choose? Worry or joy? Satan’s lies or Christ’s truth? “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Praying Life Forward

“Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24).

It was an odd concept to pray for someone I hadn’t met, but not so strange to Jesus. Although my future husband was unknown to me, he was not to God. The Lord spoke to me through the words of my friend and spiritual big sister who encouraged me to seek God’s heart in this matter. Who better to be my yenta (matchmaker) than He? And so the prayer journey began in my quest for a mate, but it did not end when we married. The practice of praying life forward continues today.

This isn’t about believing enough or reciting the right words that convince my Holy Father to give me what I want. That was how my prayer life used to be. I was bound by rituals and incantations that I desperately clung to for years in an effort to control my desired outcome. There was no peace, no joy, and no sweet communion with God. I was captive to the lie that if I prayed hard enough, long enough, often enough and with enough gusto that my faith would make God respond. My spirit was not fellowshipping with Jesus, it was at war and I did not even know it. His kindness and mercy changed everything, especially my prayer life.

Before I was born again spiritually by God’s gracious gift that I accepted in faith, my conversations with Him were manipulative. I tried to be “good enough” to earn favor; it was exhausting. Honestly, I didn’t trust God. I feared His wrath but never knew His love. Jesus forgave me, cleansed me of my sins, and sent His Spirit to live inside of me so I could learn of His love and holiness. He also taught me how to pray for God’s perfect will in my life. Trust was ever-increasing. Prayers were answered as God had planned. I wanted what Christ wanted.

When writing “My Heart’s Desire: A Journey Toward Finding Extravagant Love”, I devoted a chapter on praying for Jon before we met. Fumbling initially, God eventually shaped my thoughts and words. Reverently I prayed, “Jesus, you know who my future husband is. I pray that he is a man of faith and integrity, and that you would bless our relationship. I ask that you form me into the godly wife you envision, and that our union and home honors you. Please help us to be compatible spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially, and to be good helpmates to each other.”

Surrender and trust were interwoven together. Prayer denials or delays were His loving hand of protection, not punishment. This belief continues today whenever I pray for the things of tomorrow. I ask the Holy Spirit to go before me illuminating the right path. If God is not with me I do not want to go there! These prayers encompass every aspect of life: job changes, major purchases, vacation plans, and spouses for single loved ones to name a few. God is in the future we’ve yet to experience. Doesn’t it make perfect sense to ask Him to prepare us for it and to grant us discernment along the way?

Our marriage has been a wonderful treasure because God brought us together. He longs to shape the events of your life too. May your heart overflow with gratitude rejoicing in God’s promise when His children are praying life forward, “Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

One at a Time

“Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people He chose for His inheritance” (Psalm 33:12).

Meandering around our front yard, I am still collecting remnants of fireworks from last week’s cul-de-sac celebration. The fourth of July was extra special this year not because of the festivities we shared with our neighbors, but because I realized how incredibly blessed we are in America beyond anything we deserve. God’s touch is everywhere.

In our household there are many things to be thankful for: my nephew’s safe return from his service in Iraq, our family’s good health, and the gift of employment to name a few. But it was more than these things. As I scanned the faces of the children dancing with sparklers as their fathers sent fireworks towards heaven while mothers snapped photos, I was touched by the diversity on our street. This is what so many have fought for, the freedom to be who we are even if it is very different from the folks beside us.

Most of us gathered that warm July night were not from Raleigh. We came from different states and countries with varying creeds and contrasting races. Yet we seek many common things like a better life for ourselves and our families. With all the social and economic challenges we are facing in America today we can still be grateful the Lord has allowed freedom to reign, even though so many have ignored God completely. Jesus has been merciful in our sinfulness as our nation fights this ever raging war to drown the voice of Christianity forever.

Sitting in the back of our pickup truck beside my husband that night, I felt a sense of urgency to pray for our country to turn our hearts and lives to Jesus. As a nation begins to fear and honor the Lord and submit to His authority, the people will be healed in their spirit. After all, what is a nation but a collection of individuals? God has revealed His love to America time and time again through His only Son Jesus Christ. While some have accepted this gift of salvation and restored fellowship with God, so many more are blinded.

My prayer for salvation is broad sweeping for our country, but God has convicted to me to stay on my knees and intercede for individuals. One-by-one a revolution can take place as spirits are cleansed and renewed by Jesus. We won’t desire to take up arms aimed at our enemies when that day comes. Instead, we’ll lift our hands to heaven with shouts of joy and praises for our long suffering King who prompted others to pray we’d become His child! Then we can declare with gladness, “Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people He chose for His inheritance” (Psalm 33:12).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

The Extended Single Years

"Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him (Isaiah 30:18)."

Is being single becoming a disease you are trying to cure yourself of? Have voices of doubt from family and friends mingled with your own inner thoughts caused you to despair? Do whispers from Satan tell you if you were such a great catch you would already be caught? It wasn’t so long ago I would have answered yes to all of these questions until God began to change my heart, and my perspective. Slowly I began to realize being single was not a curse, but a time of blessed fellowship and preparation for my future.

There is nothing abnormal about desiring marriage. God created men and women to be joined together. While some people are perfectly comfortable remaining single their entire lives, the majority of us do want to get married. That being said, why does it have to be so complicated? I believe it’s because the goal is not simply to get married, but to be joined to the right spouse. Unfortunately, most couples have removed Christ from the relationship, or begrudgingly invite Him in as an unwelcome guest to be tolerated from time-to-time like a distant relative. We think we know best as we wonder why the divorce rate is so staggering.

Have you ever thought that God is protecting you from great harm by keeping you single? Do you trust that He would not withhold anything that is good from you? If marriage came so easily how tempting it would be to take your mate for granted. Maybe you feel you are ready, but the Lord may be working in the life of you future spouse. Wouldn’t you rather wait on God’s perfect timing to bring you together than to rush ahead and spoil the surprise? The longer you wait for something you really hope for, the greater the rejoicing when you behold it at last. Intense suffering in the single years can lead to greater commitment in marriage if you allow God to change your focus.

How do I know this? I was 43-years-old when I met my husband; married him at 44. There were two proposals before Jon’s. However, marrying any of those other guys would have had devastating consequences. Both those men cheated on their girlfriends and wives, including me. God was merciful; He saved me from greater pain than I had already experienced. Better still, He filled my heart with a love for Him and began to show me how we could partner through life together. If I let Him, Jesus would bring me the best husband for me, and prepare me to be a godly wife too.

My outlook on being single changed from gloomy to grateful as I dove into God’s Word daily. Bathed in His Scriptures, I surrendered the reins of control and asked the Holy Spirit to help me cooperate with His vision for my life. I gave God access to change my desire to be married, but if He planned to fulfill it I wanted the choice to be His. I prayed for God to work in my life and the life of my future husband, and for our union to honor Him. I was confident He had something really special planned for me. And He did!

If you are wondering why you are unmarried, ask God to reveal the answer before you make your own assumptions. If there are changes you need to make, the Lord will help you. The adversity and loneliness I faced in my single years strengthened me for marriage. Because I learned to turn to Jesus for wisdom, love and fellowship before and after I met Jon, my husband does not carry the responsibility only my Creator can fulfill. We cherish the gift of our marriage and the Giver who was our matchmaker. I pray you will use your single years to build up your relationship with Christ, and trust in His perfect plan for you. "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him (Isaiah 30:18)."

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Somebody Else’s Three Pretty Girls

“They shall still bear fruit in old age; they shall be fresh and flourishing” (Psalm 92:14).

Nearly ten years ago I stumbled upon Psalm 92:14 and claimed it for myself. Still single and longing to be married with kids, I believed bearing fruit meant I was guaranteed the fulfillment of this promise as it pertained to physical childbearing. Because God brought this verse to my conscious awareness, surely He was telling me motherhood was in my future. Young in my relationship with Christ, I lacked discernment in how to properly interpret the Scriptures. I assumed the first thought that popped into my brain must be the message God was speaking to me. But I would soon learn I cannot play the role God assigned to the Holy Spirit. Only His Spirit can be the accurate translator of God’s word, and I do myself harm when I fail to ask for His wisdom.

Day after day I would stare at verses, hoping my fixation on them would grant me my wish. I plastered my work cubicle with various Scriptures, including Psalm 92:14. While it was good to surround myself with Scripture, it was more of an exercise in positive thinking techniques than praying with an open heart seeking God’s impartation of His will for my life. I had convinced myself there was only one way Jesus could bring glory to Himself and children into my life, by the traditional path of physical conception and birth. I was wrong. The Lord is never constrained by human limitations and while many of life’s experiences are physical, He is always working in the spiritual realm.

In September, 2002 I became a wife and mother on the same day. I married a man with three college-age daughters. Honestly, “stepmother” was not the title I was hoping for, and I struggled with the reality of it throughout my courtship with Jon. Was I going against God’s plan by failing to trust He could give me my own baby, or were these three girls His gift to me? They would never belong to me physically or legally. Like Jon, their birth mother was lovingly involved in their lives. Desiring to tread lightly as to never disrupt this sacred parent-child bond, I considered myself void of any responsibility for the girls’ moral upbringing. God would hold Jon and his ex-wife accountable for that, but not me, or so I thought.

As a newlywed, God extended me grace in my wrong attitudes until my faith matured enough to see my sin. I am not granted a “free pass” from being a light for Christ to anyone the Father brings into my sphere of influence. Yes, He has created me with a mind and will that can choose to ignore the privilege I have been given, but one day I will answer to Him for the choices I made. Slowly the Holy Spirit enabled me to understand that my stepdaughters will be affected by my words and actions, and I have an opportunity to be a godly mentor.

Making a difference for Christ in another’s life is my passion. It’s born out of my love for all that Jesus continues to do in me, and in gratitude for people He used to draw me closer to Him. I would like to tell you that I have a strong mentoring relationship with Jon’s girls, but it’s a delicate dance. Sometimes it appears we are making great progress, other days the chasm between our opposing views widens. I am learning to love as Christ loved me, unconditionally loving the sinner while not condoning the sin. It’s God’s love that brings us to repentance. My prayer is to be the Holy Spirit’s channel of love and forgiveness to others; a beacon that points them to Jesus.

May’s celebration of Mother’s Day brings motherhood into the forefront. Prompted by the recent visit of Jon’s daughters coupled with shopping excursions for friends’ baby showers, a small undercurrent of sadness rises to the surface of my heart. Pregnancy and child rearing is not something I wish I were experiencing today, but wish I had years earlier. It still seems out of character for me to have missed it. Praise God He reminds me that He is at work bringing forth spiritual fruit (children of God) through me even though I do not see it now! And He did answer my prayer for physical children. He gave me somebody else’s three pretty girls to love. Who has Jesus put in your life? “They shall still bear fruit in old age; they shall be fresh and flourishing” (Psalm 92:14).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Glory Bound

“Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God” (Colossians 3:1).

Last Friday a close friend lost her nine-month battle with cancer. While we knew the end was inevitable, none of us expected it that particular day. She’d had a good week; I was looking forward to seeing her on Saturday. Two weeks earlier I’d booked a flight to New York where a planned gathering with our mutual girlfriends was scheduled for that afternoon. But it was not to be. The night before my flight the news we’d been dreading came calling. She’d had a seizure and never woke up. Her soul was glory bound.

This was my first experience helping a seriously ill friend prepare for heaven. In the weeks leading up to her departure I held nothing back with regard to spiritual matters. Praise God His Spirit prepared me and prompted me to share what He placed on my heart! While there have been moments of weeping these last few days, I’m filled with great peace because she is with her Lord and Savior.

In the home of one of our girlfriends we assembled to share photos, stories, laughter and tears over the loss of our friend. What a blessing to have these special relationships that were formed in our childhood years. Of the twelve of us she was the first to die, and yet I know she is more alive now than she has ever been. She’s seen God! How I wish I could get her commentary on that meeting, but one day that sweet conversation will take place.

Before leaving my friends to return to my family, one of the girls asked me to lead the group in prayer. Standing side-by-side hand-in-hand we offered praise to the Father for His glorious abundant blessings. We thanked Him for mercifully taking our friend peacefully and with dignity. Those who witnessed her death saw no suffering. She is now healed and whole in heaven, and we grieve with hope of the reunion we’ll have with her there. This separation is only temporary.

As we slowly resume our daily routines now that her funeral has passed, I smile as I see Jesus at work. We watched a loved one die, but in reality we have learned how to really live. Grace abounds, forgiveness is more easily granted, broken relationships are healing, and people are examining their faith walk. It’s all good and it’s all because of God.

For those who have believed in salvation by Christ alone, we are gifted by His Holy Spirit to display His love and glory. In Him our earthly life takes on new meaning and we find joy even in sorrow. What a privilege to be used by Jesus to offer true and lasting hope to a hurting world as we invite others to join the glory bound. “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God” (Colossians 3:1).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Tell Jesus Thank You

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him” (1 Corinthians 2:9).

It was an “out of the boat” moment; one I had been praying for. But when it arrived I almost let it pass out of fear. Stepping forward in faith is often much easier to talk about than live out, especially when others are watching you. My first reaction, when talking to a dying friend long distance as a mutual friend placed her cell phone on speaker, was to play it safe; not rock the boat of anyone’s spiritual convictions. After all, who am I to cast judgment on her faith? It’s not polite to seek assurance of her salvation, is what my mind was saying. But isn’t that what real love does? Shouldn’t I share the truth of Christ’s penalty for our sins so those who believe this will be guaranteed a place in heaven with Him? Now or never had arrived and I had a choice to make.

The call with my friend was pre-arranged the day before. My friend is losing her ability to speak and write. She’s dying of brain cancer. Knowing friends would be visiting her on Wednesday, the time was set for me to call one of the women’s cell phone. After a restless night with little sleep, I felt a strong urging to pray with her on the phone. Hours before the call I said, “Lord, you calmed the raging seas when you walked on water. Surely you can calm the storm that rages in my girlfriend’s head, even for a little while”. Simple as that prayer was, it carried a big request. My friend had not been able to make complete sentences for a week. In my hour of need I was asking for a miracle—the ability for her to understand me and me to understand her.

When I dialed the number I had no idea what I would find on the other end. Each day brings many changes in my friend’s condition. The cancer is spreading rapidly. My girlfriend, whose cell number I was calling, had offered to be the mediator as she held up her phone on speaker. A third girlfriend introduced herself, so now there were four of us connected. Nervously I said hello to my dying friend. To my delight a beautiful exchange of words took place between us. I was able to tell her I loved her and she replied in kind. What joy! But God told me I wasn’t done yet.

In an instant, I asked if it would be alright if I prayed with her. She muffled “yes” along with my girlfriend’s utterance of “go for it, Mare” setting the stage. Fumbling at first, I felt the Holy Spirit guiding me out of my comfort zone. Suddenly I was speaking as He directed. Recently my friend had slyly interjected into a sentence that she would put in a good word for me. This statement came on the heels of her latest MRI results—the tumor was growing and time was running out. I did not initially understand what she meant. Then it hit me. She was offering to put in a good word for me when she went to heaven.

There was no time to waste. Jesus had given me this chance to share Scriptures with her, and to tell her something precious. “When you get to heaven tell Jesus I said thank you”. As the cell phone owner began to speak she couldn’t contain her excitement. She hadn’t seen our sick friend so lucid and able to complete a sentence until this exchange. Praise God for this moment! He’d taken my trembling spirit and walked beside me that day. I felt as if I were really in that hospital room hundreds of miles away.

In this season of grief I am learning from death how to really live. I want to have more moments like Peter did—scared but willing to step out of the boat into the raging water where only complete dependency on Christ can uphold me. As I make this journey, I am comforted by the reality that God wants to bring glory to His name through all who are willing to trust and obey. What a treasure to be able to share with my friends that for all who love Jesus the best is yet to come. I’m still telling God “thank you” for this story, and for the gift of eternal life. Are you? “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him” (1 Corinthians 2:9).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

God is Still Good

“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress” (Psalm 46:10-11).

To say it’s been a rough week is an understatement. With the earthquake in Haiti sending shock waves of sorrow around the planet, one can’t help but wonder why ordinary life is often suddenly interrupted by extraordinary pain. Many are asking, “Where is God? Doesn’t He care? How can a loving God allow this? Is God good?” Ever wonder if it’s wrong to ask these questions? I have. Admittedly so, I have been counted among the doubters of God’s character more that I’d like to confess. As much as I disdain pondering such thoughts, I don’t believe the Father is angry that I voice them as long as I’m seeking His enlightenment. It’s the hardened attitude of my heart and mind that can get me into trouble; not the longing to make some sense out of catastrophe.

Over and over I find myself challenged when tragedy strikes my own household, and the lives of loved ones. After all, it’s much easier to offer a pat answer or quick prayer combined with your favorite Scripture for someone suffering thousands of miles away than the person directly touching your life. We can all claim that God is good until it’s our home that’s been ravaged by a natural disaster, or our life has been turned upside down with bad news. How strong is our faith in Jesus to sustain us then? When the world crumbles beneath our physical and spiritual foundations, how do we react? Do we stumble or stand? Praise God for forgiveness when I’ve failed this test!

Sometimes I have felt the Holy Spirit working through me to offer a word of encouragement to others at their lowest hour. I rejoice in those moments because they bless my soul too, and I’m very aware that the words that pour forth are not fashioned by me. Whenever I have prayed for the right words to say, God has delivered them on one condition. My soul had to be stilled to hear His voice above all the clamoring in my brain. Any attempt on my part to seek a shortcut always leads to lifeless words offering no relief to the wounded.

God has afforded me many opportunities to trust that He is good, but it has not been so easy for me. How do I offer hope to the friend who is going through an unwanted divorce, or the couple who just lost the son we’d all prayed for in a miscarriage? What do I say to the relative who’s falling deeper into an emotional and financial pit because every job he’s offered is cancelled before he starts because of funding? What hope do I have for the friends who are battling cancer and may not survive? How do I convey with sincerity that Jesus loves and cares about them? Do circumstances determine God’s goodness, or do I need to look elsewhere? In times like these my own thoughts and feelings cannot be trusted. Only God’s word can be.

Looking within myself will never give me the answers I need to life’s most difficult questions. I’m too flawed, even as God’s daughter. The only way for me to develop the mind of Christ that is available to all of His sheep, is to look at the words of the Good Shepherd in the Scriptures. What have I learned? That God is the only thing that is good, and that the sorrow I feel is part of living in a sin-filled fallen world. This was never God’s plan for the human race. Everything was beautiful and perfectly balanced in the Garden of Eden until sin forever destroyed that earthly paradise. But all was not lost forever for those who chose to believe the penalty for every sin was paid in full at the death of Jesus on Calvary’s cross. He’s alive in heaven, and one day we will join Him in paradise for there will be no sin in the presence of a holy God.

Until then, suffering will be part of our human experience on planet earth. But is does not have to be senseless. There is comfort in knowing that while we don’t have complete understanding surrounding devastating events, or have to like them; God can bring healing out of destruction if we allow Him to. Haiti is a reminder to us all of how fragile we are, and we must all be ready to meet our Maker. How prepared are you?

It’s so tempting to run from God instead of running to Him when you’re crushed in spirit. This is exactly what Satan wants—to destroy your relationship with Jesus who offers true hope regardless of your circumstances. Don’t let him win! Run as fast as you can to the feet of your Savior and ask Him to live in your heart. He will help you. Be still and know (learn) that He is good when life is not. There is great comfort in that truth. “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress” (Psalm 46:10-11).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Mary a.k.a. Martha

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:41-42).

My given name is Mary, but these days you wouldn’t know it. I more closely resemble her workaholic sister, Martha. I love December and all the magic of Christmas, but I find I am running myself ragged doing everything but sitting at my Savior’s feet; drinking from the living water of His Spirit. There’s shopping, decorating, party-planning and more, all being juggled alongside my work, family, and church commitments. Each year I tell myself it will be different; I won’t be in such a rush to complete the “to do list” I’ve compiled. But is that realistic, or even possible for a Martha personality? It is if I allow it to be.

Today I purposed to spend time reading my Bible, and reflecting on what God longed to say to my busy troubled heart. You see, I do find great joy in serving Him by “doing” things for others. There are times I am convinced the Father is calling me to get up from my chair and act upon the commands He has given, not just soak in all His love for myself. People need to be touched by the love of Christ in word and in deed. They go hand-in-hand. If they didn’t, Jesus would not have provided such an example of servant hood for us to model. My problem is often the same as Martha’s. My motivation for serving coupled with my attitude is not aligned with Jesus’ desires. This is what leaves me empty and dry.

As I communed with my precious Savior today, I found my soul quenched by His words of hope and life. Every time I read about spiritual darkness I am filled with gratitude for how God drew me to Himself, and illuminated my entire being with His love. Energy infused, I am reading to face the day. The Father assures me that wanting to do good things is not bad, but when I start to feel resentful of all that is before me it’s my signal to stop and do a heart-check. As I confess my sin of worry over many things that God has not ordained, I find forgiveness and peace. Praying that I will live more as Mary than Martha, and that I drink daily from heaven’s fountain of living water so Christ’s light can shine through me into a dark world. What a joy that will be! "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:41-42).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

What do you need, Lord?

“Then the King (Jesus) will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).

So many needs, so many blessings, all intertwined this month. My senses are functioning on high alert. Is this a sign of my spiritual maturity? I doubt it. Although much wisdom has been imparted much more needs to be put into practice. Until the day I can serve God as consistently as breathing, without analyzing why I should or should not act on the opportunities He presents, I remain stunted in my spiritual growth. November finds me mindful of a soft voice growing louder as I fight to smother the fear His response will bring to my question, “What do you need, Lord?” As always, He provides ample opportunities to be a blessing or a curse.

For me, there has been a recent surge in the need to feed others physically and spiritually. Sometimes I am prompted to prepare and serve the food, other times to donate money toward this fight against hunger. No matter what the method I have felt the Spirit at work in the details, and I am in awe. Jesus has asked His followers to join the battle against a greater starvation overtaking the world; the war to feed malnourished souls. If I’ll step forward in obedience He promises to arm me well, and faithfully He does. While many occasions to engage in such work come to memory, three are most vivid.

The first occurred one November Saturday. I frequently cook food that area churches serve to the homeless on the streets of downtown Raleigh. Jon and I longed to join the volunteers, but travel and work schedules previously interfered. At last the calendar cooperated with our wishes. While carefully shopping for the casserole ingredients I was delegated to bake the Holy Spirit whispered, “Mary, don’t skimp. Buy the best. Shop as if you are serving this to Jesus.” Reality check! Do I view the disadvantaged as people who should be happy with second best; life’s scraps? Or do I see them as jewels in the crown I will one day place before my King? Who am I serving?

Needless to say, I asked God to fill my cart with only the choicest ingredients for that casserole, and baked it with Jesus in mind. As we stood side-by-side serving the homeless that crisp autumn day, I was overcome with emotion. There were hundreds in line waiting for their warm meal. I had the good fortune of being assigned to the dessert table, where I could offer people a choice. How brightly their faces beamed when their selection was placed on their plate. Many praised God along with us, and suddenly it occurred to me that I am serving Jesus today. These are my fellow siblings in Christ! We are bound by the same living Spirit of God. Nothing separates us. We are one body.

The second occasion to serve the Lord happened this week. Jon and I hosted four International and two American students from North Carolina State University for Thanksgiving dinner. We did not know if all of them where Christians, but it didn’t matter. I approached the meal preparations with the same gusto as if God were joining us for supper. In my mind He was! I was excited to show them the love of Christ regardless of their beliefs. Who knows what God can do through the kindness of a stranger? I want to be used this way, so I am learning to pray to be more in tune to His calling.

The third chance surfaced yesterday. I was meeting my girlfriend at a coffee shop prior to my book signing event. Her cheerful voice greeted me when I entered the store as she proceeded to tell me she’d just bought the gentleman in the corner breakfast. He was homeless, and looked like he had lived on the streets for many years. Struck by her generosity, I turned to ask the man if he would like something else since I was buying myself a cup of hot chocolate. He sheepishly looked at me; then politely gave me his order. Handing him his food I blessed him. In my heart I was longing to do more, just not so publicly.

When my girlfriend went to the restroom God gave me a chance to respond as He lovingly said, “Go give him $20 discretely so only my eyes and ears can witness. Do not seek applause from anyone.” Resisting the temptation to waffle, I got up and handed the man the cash without uttering a word to my girlfriend. I only mention it now as a reminder to myself that one of the most important questions I need to be asking daily is, “What do you need, Lord?” Obedience is paramount. Perhaps you will agree. “Then the King (Jesus) will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Rejects Welcome

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“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).

Sifting through hundreds of resumes each week would sometimes leave me callous. As a corporate recruiter I was not trained to be emotionally attached to the applicants. My eyes scanned the documents seeking to identify only those who perfectly match the job description. There was no interest in the misfits. Not so long ago the Lord pressed upon my heart that the world’s standard of perfection is often translated into a reflection of His standard. This is a false perception because Jesus loves what society rejects, and welcomes us close where He makes us perfect. He does not expect us to approach Him in this state, or to pursue it without His help. Attempting this in our own strength only leaves us exhausted.

How rested do you feel today? If you are like me the endless pursuit of perfectionism the world demands leaves you depleted each day. Until recently, I never used to contemplate the people behind the names on the resumes that did not measure up to the standards the hiring manager required. More and more I see large gaps in their employment history, and I find myself saddened that I cannot help them. Because I cannot plead their case to the manager does not mean there is nothing I can do for them. There is another option God has given me; I can pray they will be blessed.

As I select the reject button that sends the candidate an email my imagination overtakes me. I wonder how they will react when they receive the automated note informing them they are not a fit. Is disappointment heavy on their heart because they have been out of work so long? Are they facing financial ruin? Have they run out of hope? How is this job search affecting them emotionally? Are they exhausted physically and spiritually? Do they have a good support system, or is their faith waning? At this moment my silent prayer begins as I beseech the Giver of all good things to bless them with work.

In the middle of one of these quiet prayers the Holy Spirit interrupts my thoughts to remind me to pray these people draw near to Jesus. He knows the longings of their heart, and will supply all that is needed. I pray He will open doors that no one can close, and that His favor rests on them. In their moment of rejection my hope is they will turn to Christ who never turns down anyone who seeks Him. There is only one qualification to be welcomed into His kingdom, and that is to believe that He paid your entrance fee with His blood. By your own merit you cannot be good enough, smart enough, or well-connected enough to gain access to heaven.

You cannot make your life’s resume flashier or join a social networking group that will put you in good standing with Jesus. This is good news to all who are worn out trying to get God’s attention as I was for so many years! You are granted direct access to Him as you develop a personal relationship with Jesus through prayer, fellowship and Bible study. This is where you will learn for yourself that He wants to lift your cares, and give you the soul rest you crave.

While my prayers for those resume owners who I may never meet may seem trivial, I believe they are powerful because God is prompting them out of me. Who knows, one day a fellow saint may whisper in my ear as we’re praising Jesus side-by-side, “You were the one who prayed for me to be encouraged when I was downtrodden. I turned to Jesus and He welcomed me in.” Such joy there will be when we behold the receiver of the prayers the Father asked us to recite. Let us ask God to sharpen our senses to those who need to hear these healing words. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

A Modern Day Forerunner

John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the desert. Make straight the way for the Lord” (John 1:23).

In Bible Study Fellowship we are studying the gospel of John this year. Before the Apostle John introduces readers to the Messiah he writes of John the Baptist, the one who points the people to Jesus. As I read the first chapter of the book of John, I was challenged by the reality that John the Baptist never denied Christ was coming, but rather denied he himself was the Christ when questioned by the Jewish priests, Levites and Pharisees. How often have my words and deeds failed to mirror those of John the Baptist? Even once is too much; this thought makes me sad. But God is igniting a new fire in me as I study this passage of Scripture. While John the Baptist directed people to the first coming of Christ, I (along with all believers) am commanded to share the news of Christ’s second coming. We are all modern day forerunners.

As a Christian, have you ever thought of yourself as one who is used by God to make straight the path to heaven? Or are you complacent in your own salvation assurance choosing instead to leave the work of evangelism to someone else? It is a very easy trap to fall into as life provides a myriad of excuses for each of us to claim as reasonable evidence as to why we are not sharing what the gospel offers. We justify our silence and validate the voice that lies when it tells us our faith in Christ alone is too narrow-minded, what others believe is none of our business, or we don’t feel “gifted” in this area of ministry. We have convinced ourselves that God selects a few special souls to share the message that judgment day is drawing near, and He does not need us to reach the masses of unbelievers on earth. We have forgotten we are no different than John the Baptist. We are His forerunners.

How do I know this? Because the last recorded words of Jesus in the Bible were the great commission to His disciples. As He anointed the twelve before He ascended into heaven, He still anoints His followers with His Holy Spirit today. The mission has not changed. “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:19-20). Two things stand out to me as I read those words of my Lord and Savior—go and tell and I will be with you wherever you are. Jesus did not command me to soak in all the abundant life He has to offer and hoard it for myself. He has asked me to share His amazing love with others, so I may share in my Master’s joy when another sinner joins God’s family.

John the Baptist provided a wonderful example for me to emulate. He wasn’t concerned about how people reacted to his appearance, his actions or his words. John’s focus was always on leading others to repentance and salvation in the Lamb of God, Jesus Christ. John was humble of heart and strong in spirit, for he left the results of his proclamations to God. He knew his place in God’s great plan for mankind’s redemption. John was not their Messiah. His only responsibility was to ready their hearts to receive Jesus. John was not appointed to lord over the people, but anointed to point the people to their Lord.

In over two thousand years the commission has not changed. Let us be those voices of light and life crying out in the spiritual wilderness of society so that others may believe. Jesus is coming back. Don’t you find it exciting to be one of His forerunners? I do! Pray with me to respond as John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the desert. Make straight the way for the Lord” (John 1:23).
Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Real Love Hurts

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

Have you ever loved someone so much you were willing to trade your comfort for their suffering? In the midst of their painful trial did your heart break as you stood by helpless to relieve their burden? Did you ask God to transfer their sorrow to you because you are strong and ready to fight for the weak? If so, whose pain were you looking to alleviate? Was it your own discomfort you wished to eliminate after you’d exhausted all your coping mechanisms? Or was it compassion for the one who suffers whose life you value above your own? Only the later is real love, and real love hurts.

There are days when I question why there is so much hardship in the world. Does Jesus not care about the person I’m praying for whose situation grows increasingly worse? Of course He does! Likewise, He cares about shaping me to be more like Him. That’s what a follower is supposed to do—reflect the image of the leader they are focused on. It’s in life’s trials that Christ reveals more of His love to me, and shows me how limited my capacity to love is without His Holy Spirit molding my heart.

Over the past few years God has given me many opportunities to feel a tiny speck of His immeasurable compassion for the whole human race. Often this involves watching someone I love suffer unbearably. There were moments when I beg Jesus to lift their cares and place them on me; fearing they will collapse under the weight of it all. I watch them trapped in their grief and in my love for them I long to pull them out of the pit of weeping into the light of rejoicing. My desire is for their season of mourning to be turned into dancing, as I cry for their plight. In my soul’s lowest hour of agony God’s voice broke through the wailing, and He shared this truth with me.

“Mary, I love them far more than you do. Your feelings of compassion come from Me. Every time you long to exchange places with them, and make their suffering your own, you are connected to My Son. I am giving you a small glimpse of my extravagant love for all mankind. Jesus loved you so much He couldn’t bear to let you die because of your sins. He elected to take your place, and it was His love for you that held Him on the cross in Calvary. His love is the greatest love. It perseveres in the face of death. It’s real, and real love hurts.”
As I ponder these words the Father has spoken to me, I am both thankful and challenged. Gratitude comes from knowing He is allowing me to experience a limited portion of Christ’s powerful love. Not only do I want more of this love, but I want to share it with hurting souls everywhere. The challenge set before me is to not give up. Real love never quits. It’s a forever love not based on whimsical feelings, but on continually choosing to love so tenaciously that I have the best interest of others in mind over myself. Praying for Jesus to help me be the lover the world needs to see so they will glorify His name. I think I’m on the right path because it hurts. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).
Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

You Will Find Me in the Garden

“The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into His harvest field” (Matthew 9:37-38).

September is one of my favorite months--a time to welcome the harvest season as we savor the last kiss of summer. All my life, September represented change. It was the start of each new school year, the month I moved from familiar surroundings to begin anew elsewhere, and the month I got married. September generally finds me full of life and energy; welcoming the new beginnings I have been afforded. This year, however, some events feel more like endings. The season of plenty has been shaken up; I question what seeds I have been sowing in life’s garden.

The first jolt struck after our San Francisco trip. Prior to vacation there were three recruiters in my corporate job, whittled down from eight this spring. Last Monday I discovered I would be working solo. Grateful for a paycheck but upset over logging in fifty-hour weeks; I feel completely depleted. I want to write, want to do my Bible study, respond to social invitations all without labeling these another “project” I have a deadline to complete. The under tow of life’s current is strong right now. I have to fight to breath in God’s truth that sustains me. As if this news wasn’t challenging enough, another wave came that toppled my spirit.

A loved one is drowning financially and spiritually. My husband and I have been one of God’s lifelines for them over the last four years, supporting them in prayer, monies, words, and temporary shelter. There have been glimmers of hope along the way when employment filled the gap, but it never lasted. Neither has love for this individual. They are alone and getting harder to reach despite our best efforts. They tell us they have all but given up on life and anything good happening. Bankruptcy is in their future, and we are deeply saddened. I found myself grieving the last week or so, wondering why this torture continues to haunt our lives. I know God loves this person more than I do, yet I am conflicted over why someone I have battled for is sinking deeper. Through tearful eyes I read my Bible and wait for the Lord to answer, and then He does.

At present, God does not give me insight into why these events are happening. He only promises me peace that comes when I trust in Him, and that He is longing to gather others into His family. Surely the Lord can do this without my help. He is Almighty and needs no one. But He has asked me as His child to join Him in this task, and harvesting requires action. Taking my focus off my feelings and listening for God’s voice, I hear a stirring in my soul that has emboldened me to share His love with others like never before. With my co-workers I reveal I am praying for them, and that God will be their protection in this storm. People seem more open to hear these words of hope because they are disillusioned by the empty promises of man. In all of the brokenness of life Jesus is making a way for His light to sign into dark lives. Although I may not feel like it, He assures me I am one of His small lanterns.

As I pray for and minister to my loved one who needs a spiritual and financial miracle, I sense God asking me to have faith that He will answer my pleas. He is not guaranteeing bankruptcy for this person will be avoided, but that He can use these tragedies for good. My greatest desire is to walk beside those I love in heaven with Jesus forever. My joy is not complete in knowing I am saved when my heart’s burden is so heavy for those who are lost.

Looking out my window I see a rose bush filled with tiny pink blossoms. This variety is a fairy rose with petite petals and flowers. It blooms in every season here, and thrives in the worst of drought. Gazing upon its beauty I have often overlooked the fact that this delicate flower is surrounded by thorns, yet never stops growing and glorifying its Creator. This is where I want to be found, working alongside God cultivating His garden. With Christ’s help the thorns of life cannot choke out the beauty of His light in me. All is not in vain. Jesus at work in me will produce a great heavenly harvest where the eternal rewards are spectacular. That’s the best workforce I could be a part of! Care to join us? “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into His harvest field” (Matthew 9:37-38).

Your fellow sojourner,

Mary

Prayer Gift Letter for My Friend

I wrote this letter for my friend who is terminally ill. Her name has been removed from the letter to protect her confidence. A special "thank you" to Lee Merrill who introduced me to "Prayer Gifts" at the Proverbs 31 She Speaks 2008 conference. The blessing lives on, Lee!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" (Isaiah 41:10 NIV).

Father, the moment I heard of my friend’s illness you spoke these words to me in prayer. I know that you wanted me to share this truth with her, this verse is for her. Please help her to see that it is a special love letter from you; meant to bring her comfort each time she meditates on these words.

Dear friend, I pray you always remember that Jesus loves you. He is right beside you holding you up before the Father. He is your greatest intercessor—He continually prays for you before the throne of grace! You are not alone. If you listen with your heart you can feel God strengthening you for this journey you are on. It is not an easy road. He knows that. You can depend on Him to walk beside you, and to provide all that you need.

May you rest assured that you are surrounded by heavenly angels when you least expect them, and most need them. Sometimes they will be angels with skin on in the form of family and friends. Other days they will be invisible to your eyes, but not your senses. I pray the knowledge of their presence ministering to your soul brings you peace.

Thank you, Father, for watching over all the affairs of my friend's life. Help her to trust in your faithfulness and all-sufficient power. Give her a special revelation of your love for her, and help her to lean on you for guidance in all her decisions. Bestow on her a peace that surpasses all human comprehension.

I praise you for her life and place my friend in your loving hands, knowing you love her deeply.

Mary Singer Wick